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So Be It 2009 Pinot Noir (6)

Consider, for a moment, the words “So Be It.” These aren’t the words of an aggressive alligator, fresh from the sewers to devour your family. These are the words of a peaceful and gentle type, like a wine-loving monk who also pats squirrels on the head. And why not? Why not, we say? What’s wrong […]

Expression 44? Pinot Noir (2)

:::sniffle::: :::snort::: :::sniff sniff::: Chad, are you OK? :::sniff::: uh … yeah. Yeah, Man. What’s up? Are you … are you CRYING? What? Me? No! Of course not. I’m not :::sniffle::: :::snort::: OKAY, I AM! I can’t help it! Whoa, whoa. It’s totally OK. What’s wrong? Is there anything I can do? What’s wrong? WHAT’S […]

Judd’s Hill Central Coast Pinot Noir (4)

Before you purchase this Judd’s Hill Central Coast Pinot Noir 4-Pack, just know that each bottle will take your palate on a mad-cap journey of bromance, pot smoke, and refusal to grow up even in the face of overwhelming responsibility and pressure to become slightly mature. Intense black cherry aromas will rumble across your nose […]

DeLoach Designate Pinot Noir 2-Pack

IMPOSSIBLY ATTRACTIVE WOMAN WINEMAKER I’m in a real bind of my own making through a series of terrible decisions with little to no regard or forethought for potential consequences! Obviously the only possible option is to do something illicit! RANDOM DUDE WHO JUST SO HAPPENS TO HAVE HIGH-ECHELON CRIMINAL CONNECTIONS Despite demonstrating no real experience […]

St. Julian Pinot Grigio Case (12)

It’s a good question, we feel. No matter how delicious the taste of Honeycrisp apples and tropical fruit, why would you want to drink a wine named after some dude you didn’t even understand? So we’ve done a little research into the matter, and we think we’ve figured out which St. Julian has loaned this […]

Swami Pinot Noir (6)

Okay, I highly DOUBT that YOU read the Constitution as often as I DO, so I just wanted to let you know about a little tidbit hidden in there. 32nd Amendment states, “All wine glasses that do not carry wine for a period exceeding 97 days can no longer be referred to as ‘wine glasses’ […]

Keller Estate Pinot Noir (4)

There’s no shame in reflecting. Even the most explosive sixteen-year-old boy will occasionally want to take a nap on the beach. We need to remember, occasionally. We need to just sit down and think about what was, and where we’ll be going next. Possibly that’s why our forefathers invented wine in the first place. How […]

Stonier Australian Pinot Noir (3)

All right, the pizza’s here at last. Let me just move these brownies and my Bob Marley CDs… what? Stoner? Sir or Madame, I’ll have you know I’m in no way a stoner. I just appreciate a good 3-Pack of Stonier. Let me tell you, it’s a dark day when a man can’t put on […]

Expression 44? Roserock Pinot Noir (2)

“Hey, what’s up, Chuck! I thought that was you.” Oh, hello Jim. Actually, it’s Charles now. I haven’t gone by Chuck since … well, I’ve actually never gone by Chuck. You just randomly started calling me that one day in 6th grade. “Good story, Chuck. So how’ve you been? I see you’ve moved to the […]

Moshin Sonoma Coast Pinot Noir (3)

For instance, imagine if you had triplets who were born in 2008. And imagine they were boys. These wines would be much, much, much, much better than that hellscape scenario. Instead of yelling “Don’t hit your brother” every thirty seconds, you would be savoring this wine’s delicate nuance of truffles, knowing you had two more […]