Monday, April 22, 2013 // Woot
Use this: to get that old-school landline feel without the old-school landline billz. Don’t use this: to sit patiently by until your ex calls you. It’s time to move on. Also, he/she doesn’t know this number. Some skeptics wonder: whether you have a phone at all, given that you never call anybody back. If you […]
Monday, April 15, 2013 // Woot
Use this: with your 3D TV, your 3D home, and your 3D corporeal self. Don’t use this: to watch “Alvin and the Chipmunks” or your brains will transform into a rich meringue. Lost in the wilderness with only this product, you could survive by: luring echolocating bats with nature documentaries about delectable moths. If you owned […]
Thursday, April 11, 2013 // Woot
We love going to the movies as much as anyone. The giant screen and the fresh popcorn are only a few of the many reasons that seeing a movie in the theaters is such a desirable option. But then there are the negatives: the couple making out next to you, the gum underneath your seat […]
Wednesday, April 10, 2013 // Woot
Use this: to project any number of Ds you want, up to 3. Don’t use this: to try any of that kinky curved-space Riemannian nonsense. This projector is strictly Euclidean, pervert. This will make you popular with: people who have 300″ screens but nothing to watch on them. If this item went to Taco Bell, […]
Tuesday, April 9, 2013 // Woot
You may have noticed that this home theater system features a subwoofer, which adds powerful low-frequency impact. But, hey – we don’t need to tell you that! After all, if you’re here shopping on Tech.Woot you know full-well what a subwoofer is! But you might not be familiar with the many other woofers. For example: […]
Monday, April 1, 2013 // Woot
Yes, Woot wades into the home-improvement fray today, and the only way to make this news bigger is to literally make it bigger. Just hook this this Optoma HD projector up to your laptop, find a wall with about 25 feet of diagonal space, and hold on to your butt joint. Every drill bit, every […]
Saturday, March 16, 2013 // Woot
Use this: because it’s so easy for your girlfriend NOT to see the cool thing you just did in Mario’s Missing when it’s on a TV. But when it takes up a whole wall? Now we’re talking! Don’t use this: to find gold in the hills. What you’re looking for there is a prospector, not […]
Thursday, March 14, 2013 // Woot
“Yes, Mr. Herrera?” “Uhh, hello? Is this Federal Parcel Shipping?” “No, Mr. Herrera. No, it isn’t.” “Who is this? How do you know my name?” “That isn’t all we know, Mr. Herrera. We also know that you were trying to call to check on the delivery of your Ooma Telo VoIP Phone System.” “Yeah, that’s […]
Friday, February 22, 2013 // Woot
Make a list of what you want in life. #1 might be sound quality, #2 might be Internet radio, #3 might be a way to listen to your iPod through a front-side USB port, and maybe #4 is six HDMI ports and a way to hear TV audio through a receiver. Or maybe we got […]
Saturday, February 9, 2013 // Woot
Use this: to give all the other Optoma projectors you’ve bought from us inferiority complexes. Don’t use this: to watch “Piranha 3D” unless you’re ready to confront a wall-sized 1080p severed willy. If this was a character in a sitcom, its catchphrase would be: “I’m your brother from another judder!” The SNL that this product […]
