Sunday, April 7, 2013 // Woot
Use this: because it’s not a matter of whether they WANT to; the fact is your coworkers NEED to hear your podcast. Don’t use this: to hold a bunch of papers together. That’s a clip, not a Klipsch. On this product’s car, there is a bumper sticker that reads: “iBrake for Phat Beatz.” Lost in […]
Monday, April 1, 2013 // Woot
Use this: to feel just as tough as those grizzled Tools.Woot shoppers. Don’t use this: if you are a mother, or we won’t be able to claim that “THIS AIN’T YO MOMMA’S PORTABLE BLUETOOTH SPEAKER!” Lost in the wilderness with only this product, you could survive by: depending on its gruff-but-world-wise brand of leadership. In […]
Wednesday, March 27, 2013 // Woot
Use this: to stream your iTunes library over your home network with Apple’s AirPlay service. Don’t use this: to airnet your library apples with your service play over streamwork home tunes. In 99.9% of uses, this doesn’t: add an early-’90s style “new jack swing” rhythm track to classic pop songs. A real Amazon review of […]
Monday, March 25, 2013 // Woot
“Mooooooom. Gavin’s using Apple AirPlay technology to play Nihilist on his Klipsch G-17 Airplay Wireless Speakers again!” Gavin, please stop torturing your brother with obscure Swedish death metal. “Mom! Nihilist is FAR from obscure! Do you even KNOW who Leffe Cuzner is?!” Isn’t he that little friend of yours with the stubby thumb? “UGH! No! […]
Friday, March 22, 2013 // Woot
Are you tired of ordering sounds a la carte? Isn’t it a pain to try to find one place that has sounds everyone likes? Don’t you wish you could gorge yourself on whatever sounds strike your fancy, without worrying about the price? Then bring you and your family’s ears down to the Audiosource Soundbar for […]
Monday, March 11, 2013 // Woot
Use this: to point out to your friends and neighbors how the version of “Bertha” the Grateful Dead played at the St. Louis Arena on May 15, 1977 was slightly funkier and had a bridge that was six measures longer than the version of “Bertha” they played two days later at the University of Alabama […]
Tuesday, February 12, 2013 // Woot
Use this: because you don’t get the full texture of the podcast’s many awkward silences through plain old earbuds. Don’t use this: to park your boat at. What you’re thinking of is a “dock.” This here is a “dock.” See, totally different. If this is buried in a field, what grows in its place is: […]
Tuesday, February 5, 2013 // Woot
Now, who’s hot who not Tell me who hops to Sellout.Woot You tell me who flopped who rocked the BlueTooth Who USB got mini, who’s mostly lithium-ion rechargable, the same ol’ slim case, you know ain’t nuttin change but my tin Can’t stop till I see my name on a Tim Cook device pullin all […]
Sunday, February 3, 2013 // Woot
Use this: if you’ve got 30 pins, like the kind on the bottom of your iPhone. Don’t use this: if you’ve got 30 pins, like the wrestling kind. If this was a character in a sitcom, its catchphrase would be: “Takes one to Tango.” In 99.9% of uses, this doesn’t: broadcast your private phone calls […]
Tuesday, January 29, 2013 // Woot
Yeah, yeah. We get it. You’re super cool and super in-the-know because you listen to music from bands that no one’s ever heard of. Like “Poutine” by Al Dente and the Sauce and “Megahertz Donut” by Electric Bathtub. But no matter how many times you cut me down for listening to “that mainstream crap” I […]
