Sunday, December 23, 2012 // Woot
Few devices have endured as much ridicule as the lowly moped, that old low-power motorized scooter that became a joke long ago? We’re not entirely sure why, but people decided it was pretty geeky to have one. That’s bad news if you’re in the business of making motorized cycles, so what do you do? Call […]
Sunday, December 23, 2012 // Woot
“And this,” Danielle decided, “will be for my dad.” A few quick folds and the Pyrex Easy Grab 19-Piece Bake Set was wrapped and ready to go. Who could say how it would change her father’s life in the next six months? JANUARY “Yes, honey, I DID wash that Oblong Dish before putting the lasagna […]
Sunday, December 23, 2012 // Woot
The frost is up the driveway now The snow, however, is late Perhaps it’s just politeness Since Olivia has her skates. The schools are closed for 2012 And Christmas joy awaits But out there on the empty streets Is Olivia and her skates. And other kids are warm at home With TV as their fate […]
Sunday, December 23, 2012 // Woot
See, with these “famous maker” things, we make a deal. We get a nice bag, and somebody else keeps their name on the down low. And that sort of deal has been going on for decades. Decades! Almost since the very first sporting company was created! Except the very first sporting company didn’t have a […]
Sunday, December 23, 2012 // Woot
Did you ever feel like you’ve been here before? Like you’ve done all this already? Man, I swear sometimes I feel like I’m stuck in the same day over and over again. I spend all day doing the same thing and it’s gotten so tedious that when I close my eyes at night I’m doing […]
Sunday, December 23, 2012 // Woot
On a cold winter evening in the wastes of the frontier, Conrelius Sugarshanks was out hunting wolves. They’d been preying on his meager herds of sheep, and he had to protect his impoverished family’s well-being. As the moon rose higher and the air grew colder, he reluctantly accepted defeat, knowing that his advantages would be […]
Sunday, December 23, 2012 // Woot
“Ladies and gentlemen, we have seen true warriors enter this arena. We have seen men fight, and we have seen men die. Tonight our final two competitors will enter the battleground for one final time, but only one will leave. Tonight we shall know who is truly…THE KING OF SHAVES.” “Shave! Shave! Shave! Shave! Shave! […]
Saturday, December 22, 2012 // Woot
We all know why you listen to music at the gym. It’s not to get pumped up for your lifts. It’s not to kill time during cardio. It’s to drown out the incessant grunting, self-congratulation, and thinly-veiled come-ons emanating from the other members of your gym. For this purpose, you really can’t beat the Motorola […]
Saturday, December 22, 2012 // Woot
Use this: because it doesn’t matter if it’s just 20 degrees out; that new Kesha track isn’t going to listen to itself. Don’t use this: if the idea of a hat singing to you is too much for you to handle. In the wrong hands, this could: do very little harm. Because it’s not made […]
Saturday, December 22, 2012 // Woot
“Where’s the Capresso 1 1/2 qt. Glass Water Kettle, Miller? WHERE IS IT????” “Aw, jeez, Hinkle. Turn off that interrogating lamp, huh? That stopped being funny weeks ago.” Hinkle shrugged and turned off the light. Miller pointed towards the closet. “Last time I saw it, it was the cupboard.” Hinkle opened the door to the […]
