Monday, September 17, 2012 // Woot
Tim and Jake stood in the doorway to Jake’s bedroom and silently surveyed the small wooden city they’d built together. For a moment, they both imagined the people that might live in Jaketown, how proud they might be to live there, and how ignorant they were to the terror that they would all face this […]
Monday, September 17, 2012 // Woot
“Yeah, no prob. I’m excited to start. It’s my first day.” “Great, we’ll get you situated. Just sit down right here in front of your refurbished AOC 23″ LED Monitor.” “Okay, so what do I do as a decoy?” “Not a hell of a lot, actually. Just announce that you’re young and innocent. They tend […]
Monday, September 17, 2012 // Woot
Remember what your science teacher taught you about dinosaurs? Well you can THROW IT OUT THE WINDOW because I’m about to drop a little truth bomb right here, right now: dinosaurs were NOT prehistoric creatures. They were WEAPONS developed by a secret government organization in the 60s. When all of the experiments failed, the government […]
Monday, September 17, 2012 // Woot
You know that one friend? That one friend who loves to make the most terrible puns? We know it’s a gentleman friend, because that’s just how puns work. So here’s your chance to finally show him up in a single sentence: “Can I get you a cab, syrah?” Now, don’t think you’re wasting money on […]
Monday, September 17, 2012 // Woot
Sorry, little mom-and-pop ice cream stand I’ll never know exists. I meant to get turned around and stop in for directions on a recent road trip, I really did. I was even going to grab one of your possibly delicious cherry pie milkshakes and then rave to my friends about finding you guys. But now […]
Sunday, September 16, 2012 // Woot
Remember the days when the iPhone 4 or iPhone 4s was the “new thing”? Oh, how young and naive we were? We’d buy a dock like this iRetroPhone as a joke. “How silly,” we’d say. “How quaint and ridiculous to disguise our highly-advanced, top-of-the-line device as an antique!” But now, the very phones we plugged […]
Sunday, September 16, 2012 // Woot
The Kite Train is a sight to behold. In fact, it’s so cool looking that it’s inspired many songs, many of which have gone on to become huge hits. Unfortunately, some of these songs had to drop the “kite” part, leading people to believe they’re just about actual or metaphorical trains. For example: The song, […]
Sunday, September 16, 2012 // Woot
And we’re BACK with So You Think You Can Use An Air Compressor! Before we went to commercial, Angel nearly blew the roof off the place with an incredible routine. Let’s see what the judges think! Ronnie Johannson of Air Compressors Monthly, you’re up first! “Throughout this competition, Rhonda, you’ve done nothing but raise the bar […]
Sunday, September 16, 2012 // Woot
Sharon took a steely-eyed look at the Smurf head on the handlebars of the My First Smurfy Trike. “So. We meet again.” Sharon had met this particular creature before, once upon a time, back in the 1980s. She’d been a young woman just starting her life. No cable, no Internet, and Saturday morning was still […]
Sunday, September 16, 2012 // Woot
Yeah, that’s the kind of teaser you used to see in bold on the pages of Nintendo Power. Remember that magazine? Well, if you don’t, you SUCK and you’re not a real gamer like I am! How’s that sweet burn? BOOOOM, BABY! IS IT THE SHOES?!?!?! Okay, okay, you’ve paid the price. Now sit down […]
