Friday, March 22, 2013 // Woot
Nice Jana Cathedral You’ve sure been around Aged for over two years and your tannins are round You’ve got a great structure Napa Meritage style Mint hints and some violets You’re top of the dial Aged inside French Oak Not too much Two years inside Made it chewy and firm And we’ll say You’re gonna […]
Friday, March 22, 2013 // Woot
You know what? Never mind. Don’t answer that. All that matters is, we’re going to be together. You’re here with your 16MP CMOS sensor and your 18x optical zoom- wait, wait, 18x optical zoom? Is that for real? Whoa. This is even more amazing than we thought it would be. Us and Nikon! That’s so […]
Thursday, March 21, 2013 // Woot
It must have been amazing to listen to the first radio station in the 1920s. Or to hear wild, exotic blues and country and jazz and rock ‘n’ roll on the radio for the first time. But we’ve all got much more specific tastes now, don’t we? And that’s why it seems like there’s never […]
Thursday, March 21, 2013 // Woot
Use this: to watch your TV, DVR, or DVD player when it’s at home and you’re not. Don’t use this: to watch adult features on crowded airplanes. We can still kind of hear whatever’s playing on your headphones. Left to its own devices, this: would watch beyond wherever you are on Downton Abbey and drop […]
Thursday, March 21, 2013 // Woot
Use this: to take the game-spooking movement out of your next hunt. And that’s game-spooking, like spooking game, as in animals, not Yahtzee. Don’t use this: at the end of a piano recital. You’re thinking of “bow” as in “taking a bow” not “bow” as in “bow and arrow.” Spelled the same, totally different. The […]
Thursday, March 21, 2013 // Woot
Karen, this bottle is yours. Danny, this is your bottle. Darling, please take this bottle and I’ll have the last one. Okay, ready? On three, we’re all going to drink this clean, pure delicious water. One. Two. Thr- oh, Danny, do you have a question? Well, son, that is a fair question, I guess. The […]
Thursday, March 21, 2013 // Woot
All these books, with names like “Old MacDonald Had a Farm” and “Five Little Monkeys Jumpin’ on the Bed” and all these CDs, like “Favorite Children’s Songs” and “Favorite Toddler Tunes” are exactly what my child needs to learn how to think, count, sing and play! Totally different from the “How To Sit In The […]
Thursday, March 21, 2013 // Woot
It’s pretty important, when describing a product’s size, to specify which dimension you’re talking about. For instance, this is a “two-inch” hair straightener. Perhaps those used to purchasing hair straighteners are used to this specification, as an experienced cyclist would immediately know that a 26″ wheel referred to the diameter. However, to us outsiders, a […]
Thursday, March 21, 2013 // Woot
“Here kitty, kitty. Dinnertime.” “That’s your cat?” “Yup! His name is Basil.” “Huh. That’s pretty thoughtless.” “What? His name?” “No, the fact that you keep him alive.” “…” “It’s just that I thought you considered yourself environmentally aware. And yet you’re ballooning your carbon footprint with this walking CO2 machine.” “That’s ridiculous! What, you think […]
Thursday, March 21, 2013 // Woot
It’s not often I’ll turn down a nice grilled Spam sandwich. Every now and again I’ll indulge in a can of Underwood Chicken Spread. And when I’m feeling especially un-bougie, I might even shake the gelatinous goo off some Vienna sausages and have me a fine little snack. But today is special, y’all. It’s not […]
