Wednesday, March 13, 2013 // Woot
Each of these shower heads has several different varied flow patterns, but did you know they each have several hidden flow patterns? Well, it’s true. Here’s a few that you can unlock if you know the secrets: Gentle Mist Gentle Myst Is that pins and needles? No, it’s a shower! Steaming Hot Surprise! Fire Hose […]
Wednesday, March 13, 2013 // Woot
Of course, there’s just no room in the film for most of the book’s vast cast of characters. But the director’s decisions about where to focus the sprawling story feel arbitrary. Abby Aachen, who appears in the book’s unforgettable opening line, was an obvious choice for heroine. But why is Xavier Zyller elevated from a […]
Wednesday, March 13, 2013 // Woot
Long ago, in a distant garden, there was a mole. A cuddly little mole. And on a crisp winter’s night, that mole looked up at the sky, and made himself a pledge. “I pledge,” he said in his tiny adorable voice, “to build the greatest mountain the world has ever seen.” And even though no […]
Wednesday, March 13, 2013 // Woot
Now, we’re not going to hard sell you here by talking about strength and endurance, muscle growth support, alertness, focus, and fat-burning. If you want to read all that stuff, you can go over to the features, which were probably written by people much smarter than us. But guess what? The people who wrote things […]
Tuesday, March 12, 2013 // Woot
Use this: to share stuff without ever touching another person! Don’t use this: to replace the tooth that got knocked out. It won’t fit. The only way to make this better would be: if it said, “Hello Moto!” when you plugged it in. C’mon, we’re not the only ones who miss that, right? This just […]
Tuesday, March 12, 2013 // Woot
Use this: to piece together memories of your former life, after the accident. Don’t use this: as an alternative to remembering anyone’s name at a party. You win at this product by: witnessing a giant meteorite explode in mid-air. Rejected Names for this Product Include: The Lil’ Blackmailer If this were a character in a […]
Tuesday, March 12, 2013 // Woot
Well, here’s the big one. Here’s the way to tell if you’re an old Woot fan or a new Woot fan. Just take a look at these happy, croaking techphibians and reach into your heart. Not literally, of course, as that would kill you. Reach in with your mind. And then, on a scale of […]
Tuesday, March 12, 2013 // Woot
I was working on my experiments, and next thing I know, we’re all roughly the size of ants. That yellow wall next to you, that’s actually a banana. Now, not to worry, I’m working on a formula that should get us back to a normal size, but it may take a little while. In the […]
Tuesday, March 12, 2013 // Woot
Use these: To ballast your vessel, the HMS Alkaline. Don’t use these: in your Billy The Big Mouth Bass. It’s time to put him to sleep, we’re afraid. Benjamin Franklin said of these: “How do I get my kite inside?” When irradiated, this product will bite you, giving you the power of: easily being replaced […]
Tuesday, March 12, 2013 // Woot
I pushed my face up against the rifle’s stock, squeezed one eye closed, and held my breath. The giraffe was over a hundred yards out — no easy shot. I felt the throb of my heartbeat rock the sight gently back and forth as I held the dusty African air in my lungs. One more […]
