Friday, April 19, 2013 // Woot
I guess if we were marketing these plush toy/pillow/fleece blanket combos to 13-year-old boys, Boobies would be a better name. But we’re not. So we’ll just stick with the name Zoobies to describe these cute and cuddly creatures. OK, I know what you’re thinking. If you’re talking about cute and cuddly “creatures,” the word Boobies […]
Friday, April 19, 2013 // Woot
“Dad, can you come here for a minute? I want to talk.” “What’s up?” “Well, as you have noticed, my body is going through a lot of changes…” “Oh no…are we going to do this now?” “Now hold on, dad. This is a very special time in my life…” “…oh god…” “A time when you […]
Friday, April 19, 2013 // Woot
The cat dozed on the windowsill while Human dressed himself in the other room. Suddenly, ears erect, the cat turned to the front door and the sound of footsteps. “F.B.I.! Open up!” A stern human voice sounded through the small apartment. The cat fled underneath the sofa, its tail a-bristle. The human, drowsy and alarmed, […]
Friday, April 19, 2013 // Woot
“Whatcha … whatcha up to there, Charlie?” I’m prepping for my climb. I’m going to be the first person in history to reach the peak of that geyser. “Um … so I don’t think that’s the best idea.” I know I might not make it to the top. But it’s something that I just have […]
Friday, April 19, 2013 // Woot
“Wow. Nice new tablet.” “Oh thanks! Though, to be honest, it’s not really ‘mine.’” “You’re borrowing it from a friend?” “Not exactly. I’m using the new Tablet2Go service. It’s like Zipcar or Car2Go, but for Android tablets.” “Uh…huh.” “You see, there are Asus Transformer Pad Infinity tablets distributed all over the city. When you need […]
Thursday, April 18, 2013 // Woot
Fire Pits can be identified by their tile mantle and 24-inch steel bowl. Fire Pits are often found arriving in boxes. Trainers have reportedly found Fire Pits the easiest of all the 765 Outdoorimons to attract. This Fire Pit has a growth rate of SLOW unless the owner makes use of the EASY TENDING AND […]
Thursday, April 18, 2013 // Woot
Just an FYI, this is a 3D Blu-ray Player, A REAL BLU-RAY PLAYER! We only mention this because there’ve been a lot of different products that aren’t real Blu-Ray Players trying to capitalize on Blu-Ray’s success. Like: Blue-Ray Players: will play all your favorite movies, but makes color is a shade of blue. Boo-Ray Players: turns […]
Thursday, April 18, 2013 // Woot
Sometimes I don’t want commitment. I don’t want to have to settle down, make any promises, or any of that. I also don’t want to deal with the pageantry or the politeness of setting myself up with a stereo. I just want my music, quick and easy, and that’s what the Onkyo Wireless Music System […]
Thursday, April 18, 2013 // Woot
Use these: if you’re planning to visit the Pacific Northwest anytime between September and July. Don’t use these: to fix the leak in your roof. In 99.9% of uses, this doesn’t: have more fun than you do on your hike. Archie Tinker, rodeo cowboy, describes how to best wrangle this product: “Y’see, this shoe’s got […]
Thursday, April 18, 2013 // Woot
Okay, so these last two seasons we’ve seen a steep decline in our network’s ratings. But don’t worry! I’ve got an idea for our spring season that’ll turn everything around: “iRobot Roomba 530: The Show.” Imagine the possibilities: Families will come together, turn on their Roomba 530, and watch as it cleans their home. They’ll […]
