Tuesday, November 13, 2012 // Woot
“Nice shirt, man. You get that from the Shirt.Woot reprint catalog?” Totally. You can never have too many LOR and Doctor Who wardrobe mash-ups, now can you? “No way. Not even possible. So what’s going on?” Just got done watching Fast Times. “Oooh, is that a Samsung 3D Blu-ray Player?” Yeah. “OH MAN! Phoebe Cates […]
Monday, November 12, 2012 // Woot
Listen, ye citizens of free-thinking western states, just because you can legally smoke a ton of marijuana before watching the Coen Brothers’ 2007 Academy Award winning thriller on your crystal-clear Optoma HD23 1080p projector doesn’t mean you should. Believe us. Really. You see, every blood-chilling scene in the adapted Cormac McCarthy novel will be brought […]
Monday, November 12, 2012 // Woot
“Bro. This is like a skateboard thing.” “I know! The Razor RipStik DLX is like a cross between a skateboard and a snowboard! It’s got a pivoting deck so you power it by swerving around, grinding sidewalk.” “Yeah. Yeah, it’s nice. I just thought, in light of recent electoral events that you meant something different […]
Monday, November 12, 2012 // Woot
It was the same every winter, and it always made Tim feel like he was failing as a father. The heat turned on, the dry coughs started. Maybe he could pretend Olivia was too grown up and Jake had to be tough, but poor little Ella? Tim couldn’t spin his lies around her. And he […]
Monday, November 12, 2012 // Woot
THE SMALL BOOK OF ELLA’S WISDOM as recorded by Ella, in crayon (in her own secret language no one else can read) 1: While learning to use the potty, avail yourself of any helpful circumstances you may discover along the way. 2: If such circumstances are favorable, such as in the case of Seventh […]
Monday, November 12, 2012 // Woot
Stephanie won’t talk to me. Valerie refuses to acknowledge my existence. I don’t even know if Ana is still alive. It’s amazing how quickly people move on. It’s amazing how quickly people are willing to forget you ever existed. But not you, my 8″ Memory Foam Queen-Sized Mattress. You contour to the shape of my […]
Monday, November 12, 2012 // Woot
Q: How do two civilized narwhals settle their differences? A: By having a pointed discussion. Q: Why did the Narwhal choose to vacation in Italy? A: Because he thought he’d fit right in in TUSCany. Q: What did the easy-going narwhal with a southern accent say when he learned he was a mammal? A: “Whale, […]
Monday, November 12, 2012 // Woot
You might be saying “Wow! Brack Mountain Enos Girasole is such a crazy name!” But it’s not, you see. Not really. It’s a lovely and beautiful name. But it also holds mysterious secrets. Secrets that can only be revealed… through the power of anagrams. For example, you might be startled to learn one anagram of […]
Monday, November 12, 2012 // Woot
Yeah, we know. App-WHAT? What a crazy name! Who’s ever heard of THESE guys before? But trust us: you’re gonna be happy you take the chance on these virtual unknowns in the world of computers. Face it, America loves the underdog, right? You go to the track, boom! Bet on the 20-1 longshot! You go […]
Sunday, November 11, 2012 // Woot
You should use your Swann FreeStyle 1080p Action Cam: to make a sweet first-person video of your latest biking adventure. We use our Swann FreeStyle 1080p Action Cam: to unsuccessfully capture footage of the lizard-like creature living in the bathroom. You hear that, landlord! Keep telling us we’re crazy! SOON WE’LL HAVE PROOF AND THEN […]
