Monday, November 5, 2012 // Woot
“Miranda, I know we haven’t been, well, clicking, and I want to apologize for that. Work’s been stressful but that’s no excuse. Anyway, I want to make it up to you. To us. So I bought one of those ‘personal massagers’ to try and spice things up.” “Are you sure? This doesn’t look like what […]
Monday, November 5, 2012 // Woot
Hinkle stared at the face in the mirror. A dusty face. An old face. A face in need of a shave. And until a few weeks back, the face of a policeman. But now? Now it was just the face of some schmoe. Or shmo. A face that didn’t even know how to spell. Hinkle […]
Monday, November 5, 2012 // Woot
Michelle leaned back into Tim’s arms. Away from the campfire, the gowsticks were spinnng in the hands of their children. “Dare you to guess who’s who.” “That one there, that’s not moving very quickly. That’s Ella,” “Low to the ground, that’s easy.” “Okay, you go, then.” “Fine! The flasher mode one, that’s Jake.” “By the […]
Monday, November 5, 2012 // Woot
“Admiral.” “Report.” “Scan of Sector 742 complete. Results indicate the blue planet creatures have yet to initialize the Utopia device.” “Really? Interesting. How long has it been?” “Roughly 250,000 of their solar cycles. Barely a thousandth of a cosmic year.” “Perhaps we overestimated their intelligence.” “They seem naturally inquisitive. They have recently invented what they […]
Monday, November 5, 2012 // Woot
There will be three essays in this class: one 3 page response due next month, one 5 page paper due at midterm, and one 10 page paper due on the last day of classes. Please type and double-space these, and use a 12 point Times or Courier font. DO NOT use Cluevetica. Honestly, this is […]
Monday, November 5, 2012 // Woot
I’m not kidding, man. If I have to listen to Angela whining about wine one more second, I’m going to throw myself off a building. One minute it’s “I just don’t know. I like the chocolate and cherry in this Cabernet,” and the next it’s “But then I really like the sound of the blackberry […]
Monday, November 5, 2012 // Woot
The year is 6997. Florescent gangs roam grey shopping malls. Deadly kung-fu robots fight with liquid swords above black hole apartment-spheres. The work of Grant Morrison is taught in pre-schools. This is… the far future. And yet, your 4.7″ Magellan Road Mate GPS will still be able to download updates for the maps. That’s how […]
Sunday, November 4, 2012 // Woot
Do you know what happens to batteries when you’re done using them? Would it surprise to learn that they’re taken, shipped to a far-away land, and used to build castles for an evil despot prince who has no respect for the welfare of his citizenry, forcing them to toil away for 18 or more hours […]
Sunday, November 4, 2012 // Woot
Think about it. When’s the last time you saw the Dark Knight stop to pull out something like this CamelBak Groove .6L Filtered Bottle? He spends all night FIGHTING people, for crying out loud. Have you ever fought someone? Really fought, not like roughhousing with your brother or something. Then you know that after roughly […]
Sunday, November 4, 2012 // Woot
Not that she asked for it, or even remotely wanted it, but after Danielle had broken her ankle, Phil declared that he’d be taking care of her until she got back on her feet again. Truth be told, Danielle was pretty certain he hadn’t paid his rent for awhile and just needed a place to […]
