Friday, October 5, 2012 // Woot
Sylvia puffed until the end of her cigarette burned orange, then shook the match to put out the flame. She loved the sulphur smell that lingered afterwards. It was soothing to her. Some people had chamomile tea. Others had lavender bath salts. Sylvia had freshly extinguished matches. She tossed her pack of cigarettes into the […]
Friday, October 5, 2012 // Woot
Michelle looked up from her book to see Tim coming back from the backyard through the sliding glass door. “That was quick,” she said. “I guess the boys were pretty tired?” It was hard to hear through the bear mask he was wearing, but she was pretty sure he said “I don’t want to talk […]
Friday, October 5, 2012 // Woot
“I’ve got cancer. I’m going to die. I need to make sure my wife and children are financially secure, and my meager earnings as a high school Chemistry teacher won’t do.” “I’m one of your failed students who’s become a low-level root beer dealer on the mean streets of a tiny Southwestern town. I’ll help […]
Friday, October 5, 2012 // Woot
Once you get this shirt costume, it’s a shame to let it go to waste on just a couple of hours at a Halloween party. What you want to do is MILK the idea for as much as it’s POSSIBLY worth, until only a husk of any original enjoyment you might have derived from it […]
Friday, October 5, 2012 // Woot
Excuse me, I don’t mean to bother you, but your name doesn’t happen to be Helios, does it? Helios Cabernet Sauvignon, graduated from Corison Winery back in 2005? I thought it was you! Don’t you remember me? I’m Helios Syrah! How have you been, buddy? I’m good, man, I’m doing really well. Still got my nose […]
Friday, October 5, 2012 // Woot
RECENTLY, IN THE WOOT OFFICES “Hey everybody, it’s our favorite client, those guys who make the amazing robot vacuums!” “Oh, hi! You must be from Roomb-“ “NEATO, that’s right, Dave, these are the folks behind the NEATO XV-21 Pet & Allergy Robotic Vacuum, obviously THE name in robotic vacuums.” “Oh, right. Uh, nice to meet […]
Thursday, October 4, 2012 // Woot
Have you seen how many people have YouTube channels just dedicated to videos of them playing video games? There’s at least five that I know of. I want in on that action! That’s why I got this HP 17.3″ Quad-Core Laptop with Blu-ray player I’m gonna set up a way to record all my Steam […]
Thursday, October 4, 2012 // Woot
You’re a mover and a shaker. You’re active. You’re just as comfortable under pressure on the golf course as you are in the board room. That’s why you need a shirt that can keep up with you. You need a shirt that doesn’t hold you back. Enter the Fila Performance Polo. You want style? It’s […]
Thursday, October 4, 2012 // Woot
Danielle sat down to watch the latest webisode of Home Matters as she took a sip of her cappuccino. She crinkled her nose and made a disgusted face. But not because of the drink. No, that was absolutely delightful thanks to the steam nozzle milk frother on her KRUPS Espresso Machine, and the pre-portioned espresso […]
Thursday, October 4, 2012 // Woot
Ever since Michelle had bought the Aussie Ice Slushy Maker, Jake had been coming up with all sorts of frozen concoctions. At first it was pretty tame: fruit punch, lemonade, orange soda. After about a week, however, he started venturing into milk-based slushies including Yoo Hoo and Strawberry Quik. Hey, it wasn’t Michelle’s cup of […]
