Tuesday, August 28, 2012 // Woot
I’m sick of watching all those guys glide by so elegantly on their paddle boards. I can do that! All I need is a paddle board of my own, except holy crap they’re expensive. No problem! I’ll snag one of these Tower Inflatable Paddle Board Bundles! Ha ha! Now I’ll show those idiots who’s- SPLASH! […]
Tuesday, August 28, 2012 // Woot
“Phil?” He looked up from the Highlights magazine when the nurse called his name, a little disappointed that he still had not found the tea cup in the Hidden Pictures. “Dr. Daniels will see you now.” He struggled to get up from the toddler-sized chair. His legs had fallen asleep after being shoved up near […]
Tuesday, August 28, 2012 // Woot
Say what you want about childhood, but it’s not always as easy as ABC and 123. Life is a puzzle, and Ella wasn’t quite sure how all the pieces fit. She didn’t understand what the big deal was. So the fish want to go hang with the farm animals, and the neighborhood pets want to […]
Tuesday, August 28, 2012 // Woot
“Stan, are you OK?” “I’m fghine…I’m fghine.” “You don’t look so good, have you been drinking again?” “Ngho. I haven’t. I told you I stopped drinking beer and replasched it with homeade root [hic] beer.” “Is that what all these empty 2-liter bottles are? Stan, I think it’s great that you’re finally off the sauce, […]
Tuesday, August 28, 2012 // Woot
Ladies and gentlemen of the Internet Standards Board. I hereby propose that raccoons become the next self-perpetuating cute-animal meme-thing. Cats are tried and true. Narwhals are experiencing their day in the sun. Isn’t it time to allow raccoons into our august institution? I will now present some salient facts about the raccoon, that should quickly […]
Tuesday, August 28, 2012 // Woot
Okay, okay. Guys. Seriously. I know you like the color green and you like the color orange but can’t we just put it all past us and make peace? We all gotta get along here in the Napa Valley, right? Look, let’s just evenly split things up and see if that helps things. Okay, Big […]
Tuesday, August 28, 2012 // Woot
In the interest of dispelling confusion, today we’re going to clarify and compare our TomTom XL340S LIVE GPS with the classic tom-tom drum. Join us, won’t you? We think you’ll find it as helpful as twelve months of real-time traffic information. So let’s make it clear, the TomTom XL340S LIVE GPS will not add depth […]
Monday, August 27, 2012 // Woot
Ah, honey! Look it’s a deal for Panasonic 6.0 Handset Phones! A three pack! “Ah, perfect! One for each of my hands!” Wait, what? Honey, I said there were three of them. “Oh, boy. I knew this day would come eventually. I need to tell you something, Loraine.” No! No, it’s not possible! “It is. […]
Monday, August 27, 2012 // Woot
Hey look! Another backpack! But wait, you’re probably thinking, didn’t you guys just try and sell me a backpack Friday?. Well, yeah. But forget all about that crummy old backpack. Everyone who bought that one was a big idiot. Unless you bought one, too. Then forget we said that. But if you didn’t buy one […]
Monday, August 27, 2012 // Woot
It had been almost two months since Hank won the Neato XV-12 All Floor Robotic Vacuum off Nestoras. And since then, Hank’s apartment had been spotless. Except for the pile of dirty clothes near the bed. Hank reasoned he needed to have some obstacles in the way to use the Neato XV-12 All Floor Robotic […]
