Wednesday, March 21, 2012 // Woot
Selling a mirror is tough Mirror for sale! Ignore reflection pls! What I’m offering here is a high quality mirror: beautiful, vintage, and easy to hang! See photos below! Try not to let the face I’m making skew your judgement. (The pics were taken with my Samsung 14MP Digital Camera which has Smart Face Recognition […]
Wednesday, March 21, 2012 // Woot
35 Hour Energy Hello, Duracell Tech Support? Yeah, I’ve got a kind of a weird question… Well, okay, so I was out pretty late last night, and then I had to open the coffee shop in the morning, and I was feeling really tired, and, you know, I wasn’t just out drinking Gatorade, so things […]
Wednesday, March 21, 2012 // Woot
Alright, let’s go through the checklist. Always turn your headphones down before encasing yourself in a high-power military exo-skeleton. Alright, looks like all systems are go. I’m ready to ROCK! This thing is nuts! I can’t believe it takes five technicians and two hours just to bolt this combat exo-skeleton together around me! But now […]
Wednesday, March 21, 2012 // Woot
Location Matters There comes a time in every male’s life when he wants to make his bedroom look like a sports bar. Maybe it’ll hit at age seven, or maybe it’ll hit at age thirty eight. But when it hits, it’s impossible to ignore. Down go the posters of cartoon characters, up go the dogs […]
Wednesday, March 21, 2012 // Woot
God Forbid The Kid Fold A Map If you’re worried about your darling little angel, know this GPS has a “Where Am I?” feature. You’ve done all you can to raise your child properly, but soon, they’ll be out of the nest. They’ll get in their car and drive away. And then, in about six […]
Wednesday, March 21, 2012 // Woot
Like Lipstick On A Pig Son, if you had questions about girls, you could have just come to me and asked, you know. Son, I know this is uncomfortable to talk about with your old man, but I need you to put down the video game controller and pay attention to me for a moment. […]
Wednesday, March 21, 2012 // Woot
Alphaing Yo, what up. My name Jim, I’ll be your knife steward today. Whatcha want? This your babe? What up, babe. You’re pretty fine. You guys want to hear our specials or you got questions or should I just blow off? Oh, right, you want a good collecting knife. Well, I got this Asset 1930 […]
Wednesday, March 21, 2012 // Woot
Takin’ a breather F5, F5, F5, Jeez! This aPen A4 Digital Recording Wireless Pen has been up here all day! I mean, this has got to be the biggest Woot-Off killer ever! But maybe it’s not the pen’s fault. Maybe it’s just Woot’s server. I mean, it’s not even loading the flashing light graphics or […]
Wednesday, March 21, 2012 // Woot
Look kid, you want to make the tour, don’t you? You’re gonna need sponsors. And beggars can’t be choosers. “Name’s Rick. I’ve been watching you on the course these last few weeks, kid. You’ve got a great driver, you’re fantastic from the fairway, and your putting is downright supernatural. Why aren’t you taking a shot […]
Tuesday, March 20, 2012 // Woot
Mona Lisa Underachiever When I was a child, I spake as a child. But when I was a man, I had to accept that living in a cyberpunk future would be sort of expensive. Back in sixth grade, hey, I spent all day imagining I was in The Matrix or something. Powerful computers, open networks, […]
