Saturday, August 25, 2012 // Woot
I can’t believe you are so hung up on that last wine you were with, girl. Didn’t you notice how that harsh palate of his drove your friends away? And don’t even get me started on his aroma. All I’m gonna say is that I’ve been with rubbing alcohols that smelled sweeter than that, honey, […]
Saturday, August 25, 2012 // Woot
Sure, I’ve got a lot of other duties, like directing all things and anchoring the universe with my existence, but a lot of my workday is spent monitoring humans. It was just a lot of busywork until I picked up the Zmodo 4 channel surveillance system with 4 CCD night vision outdoor cameras. I know, […]
Friday, August 24, 2012 // Woot
Okay, just to be clear: we had a little bit of a mix-up, so some of these are HP Gaming Desktops – as in HP desktops with appropriate specs to allow for maximum game-playing – and some of the are HP Gaming Desktops – as in, desktops that are built specifically to game the system. […]
Friday, August 24, 2012 // Woot
It’s been six long years, but I finally got that Associate’s Degree. And before I jump headfirst into the job market to start my adult life I think I’m going to take some time off and see the American Midwest with nothing but my Kelty Courser 40 Backpack. The World’s Largest Toilet, The World’s Largest […]
Friday, August 24, 2012 // Woot
Ernie was 100% genuine Americana, a dusty relic of a bygone era. The days of the door-to-door salesmen were long gone. The proliferation of online shopping over the past 15 plus years had made sure of that. Truthfully, however, sales hadn’t been all that steady for more than 20. Still, he got up every morning, […]
Friday, August 24, 2012 // Woot
Olivia’s mouse hovered over the trash can icon in her SPAM folder when she noticed something that shouldn’t have been there. It was historical. It was educational. It was 218 wooden blocks with laminated, hand-painted artwork featuring motifs inspired by the buildings and monuments that make up the US Capitol. She knew immediately that she […]
Friday, August 24, 2012 // Woot
I’m not a slovenly, grease-stained fool. I’m an ARTIST! This Ecolution Artistry Fry Pan says so! Sure, you might say frying up candy bars and doughnuts is obscene; the First Amendment gives you that right. But you can’t legislate morality, and you can’t ban my art just because you disagree with it. All genius is […]
Friday, August 24, 2012 // Woot
Nerds are wonderful, and so are nerd jokes. Nerdery encompasses a near-infinite panoply of reference points, minutiae, and trivia for the comedically inclined. Want to make a joke about C++? You’ll have a captive audience. Deep Space Nine? Have at it, intrepid humorist. But beware: The great potential power of nerd humor comes with equally […]
Friday, August 24, 2012 // Woot
I am but a blue nomad on a journey into the great unknown, and I go onward with much anticipation. I am on the cusp of solving life’s greatest mystery. And I look forward to my discoveries. When I consider the word “heaven” I imagine a world filled with the explosive aromas and flavors of […]
Friday, August 24, 2012 // Woot
You think just because you’re all puffy and fluffy and adorable, you think you can just waltz in here and take over? Think you can spread your seeds on the breeze and dig those roots into my freshly groomed lawn? Because I’ve got news for you, dandelion: you’re no flower. You’re just a weed. A […]
