Skil Tool Set – $9.99

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

I’ll Be Driving Screws (Forever)

Most fans give the boys in the band flowers or teddy bears or underpants. I prefer to give them something they can use.

This is why you should let me backstage instead of any of these other howling idiots. Keep me from my mission, sir, and I vow I shall send a strongly-worded letter to the band’s management informing them of the Skil Tool Sets they missed out on because of your intransigence. Do you value your career in the music industry? Well, you’ll be lucky to get work putting up flyers for high-school Battles of the Bands after I get through with you.

How do you think Jordan will react when he learns that a stubborn, piglike bodyguard – I say it only as a description, sir, not an insult – cost him a shot at a 4-in-1 Folding Utility Saw and Knife Set? Perhaps it’s for the best that he won’t have those 10 extra blades close at hand.

I certainly wouldn’t want to be you when Jonathan gets the news about his lost Ratcheting T-Handle Driver Set, either. His pretty-boy looks and mild-mannered persona will take a savage turn when he learns he’s been cheated out of 59 pieces, including most standard SD bits and sockets. If you’re lucky, he’ll be too enraged to even get to the part about the telescoping capability that allows you to work in hard-to-reach areas. If you’re not lucky, you’ll feel it in some hard-to-reach areas of your own.

Of course, Joey’s temper is legendary. I can’t imagine what he’ll be like when the fires of his rage are stoked by losing the Ergonomic Ratcheting T-Handle driver set that I carefully selected for him. We’re talking 10 flathead bits alone, sir, along with a wide selection of Phillips, Pozidrive, Torx, Hex, and Robertson bits. Need I mention the assortment of sockets as well?

And for your sake and the sake of any children unlucky enough to be yours, you’d best hope Donnie never learns that you denied him this 3-Pack Hard Case Set, including a 16-piece 1/4” Driver Set, a 14-piece Precision Screwdriver Set, and a 21-piece Ratcheting Screwdriver Set, each in its own hard case. There’s no telling what he might do. I don’t have to tell you what happened to his brother’s extraneous nipple.

So what’s it going to be? Are you going to allow the Kids to accept the thoughtful and useful gifts I’ve come to offer them, or are you going to keep demanding I produce some absurd “laminate”? Think carefully before you answer, sir, as carefully as I have in choosing these Skil Tool Sets for the titans of late-20th-century pop music-

Oh, wait. Dammit, I forgot about Danny again. Is there a vending machine around where I can get a pack of gum or something?

Warranty: 1 Year Iron Bridge Tools

Condition: New

PLEASE NOTE FULL NAME OF THE TOOL SET WHEN ORDERING

================================

4-in-1 Folding Utility Saw & Knife Set w/ 10 Extra Blades:

• Cut or saw through a variety of materials with this handy, heavy-duty utility knife/saw kit
• An ergonomic handle and a quick release tab that allows for speedy yet safe blade changes
• Once the blade is in place, it is locked in for effortless, easy use
• Three Saw Blade Types: Metal/PVC, Wood, and Drywall
• Case Measures 4.5” W x 6.75” L
• Includes Nylon Zippered Case

Additional Photos:

• 4-in-1 Folding Utility Saw & Knife Set w/ 10 Extra Blades
• 4-in-1 Folding Utility Saw & Knife Set in Nylon Case
• Nylon Case
• Folding Saw & Knife Closed
• 4-in-1 Folding Utility Saw & Knife Set Packaging

In the box:

• (1) Skil 010-265-SKL 4-in-1 Folding Utility Saw & Knife Set w/ 10 Extra Blades

================================

Ergonomic Ratcheting T-Handle:

• Includes Ergonomic ratcheting T-handle, (34) screwdriver bits, 25mm adaptor, and (16) 1/4-inch sockets
• Held in carrying case
• Screwdriver Bits:
  – 10 Flatheads: Sizes 3, 4, 5, 5.5, 6, 1/8, 5/32, 3/16, 7/32, 1/4
  – 3 Phillips: Sizes 0, 1, 2
  – 3 Pozidrive: Sizes 0, 1, 2
  – 6 Torx: Sizes 10, 15, 20, 25, 27, 30
  – 5 Robertson: Sizes S0, S1, S2, S3,
  – 8 Hex: Sizes (2) 3, 5/32, 4, 3/16, 5, 1/4, 6
• Sockets:
  – Metric: Sizes 4mm, 5mm, 6mm, 7mm, 8mm, 9mm, 10mm, 11mm, 12mm
  – Standard: Sizes 5/32, 3/16, 1/4, 9/32, 5/16, 11/32, 3/8, 7/16

Additional Photos:

• Ergonomic Ratcheting T-Handle
• Ergonomic Ratcheting T-Handle in Case
• Ergonomic Ratcheting T-Handle Packaging

In the box:

• (1) Skil 010-357-SKL Ergonomic Ratcheting T-Handle Set

================================

Ratcheting T-Handle Driver Set:

• This 59-piece stubby T-driver set includes most standard SD bits and sockets for wide-ranging use
• Telescoping capability allows you to work in hard-to-reach areas
• Storage case offers a comfortable, high-torque grip for easy portability
• T-Driver Dimensions (L x W x H): 3.5” x 1.25” x 1.25”
• Includes (20) Sockets, (36) Screwdriver Bits, Extension Bar

Additional Photos:

• Ratcheting T-Handle Driver Set
• Ratcheting T-Handle Driver Set in Case
• Ratcheting T-Handle Driver Set Packaging

In the box:

• Skil 009-101-SKL 59pc T Driver Set

================================

3-Pack Hard Case Driver Set/Precision Screwdriver Set/Ratcheting Set:

Skil 16-Piece 1/4” Driver Set

• Great tool set for around-the-house projects
• Reversible ratcheting driver and bit driver has a 4 3/4”, non-slip handle
• Includes a durable carrying case that will keep your sockets and bits organized
• Includes:
  – (1) Ratcheting 1/4” Driver
  – (1) Extension Bar
  – (6) Sockets – Sizes 3/16”, 1/4”, 5/16”, 9/32”, 11/32”, 3/8”
  – 8 Assorted Bits: (2) Flathead – Sizes 4, 5; (3) Phillips – Sizes PH1, PH2, PH3; (3) Square – Sizes S1, S2(x2)

Skil 14-Piece Precision Screwdriver Set

• Ideal tool sets for jobs that require smaller instruments, including fixing eyeglasses, making jewelry, changing batteries, and working on electronics
• 4 3/8”, non-slip grip handle
• Precision ground blades
• Fits easily in the plastic storage case with clear cover
• Includes screwdriver handle, 4 1/2” extension bar
• 12 Assorted Precision Bits:
  – (3) Flathead – Sizes 1, 2, 3
  – (3) Phillips – Sizes PH000, PH00, PH0
  – (2) Torx – Sizes T5, T6
  – (2) Square – Sizes S0, S1
  – (2) Hex – Sizes H1.3, H1.5

Skil 21-Piece Ratcheting Screwdriver Set

• Small and portable, this 21-piece set goes anywhere
• Includes (20) 1-inch Bits: Philips, Flathead, Torx, and Hex
• Ratcheting driver is chrome with a non-slip grip handle
• Driver is 4.25-inches long
• Comes with 20 Assorted Bits:
  – (4) Flathead – Sizes 3, 4, 5, 6
  – (5) Phillips – Sizes PH0, PH1, PH2, PH3
  – (3) Torx – Sizes T10, T15, T20
  – (3) Hex – Sizes 3, 4, 5
  – (5) Square – Sizes S0, S1, S2(x2), S3

Additional Photos:

• 3-Pack Hard Case Driver Set/Precision Screwdriver Set/Ratcheting Set
• 3-Pack Hard Case Packaging

In the box:

(1) Skil 009-055-SKL 3pk Hard Case includes:

• (1) Skil 1/4” Driver Set
• (1) Skil Precision Screwdriver Set
• (1) Skil 21-Piece Ratcheting Screwdriver Set

Woot! – One Day, One Deal