Nike Grade A Recycled Golf Balls 36-Pack

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

It’s the opening night of the play, and you, the stage manager, have a problem. The crucial, climactic scene calls for there to be a plate of spaghetti and meatballs on the dining room table. Well, you’ve got the spaghetti, just no meatballs.

Now, the leading lady is a staunch vegetarian. Like, she’d refuse to be on stage with real meatballs even if you had them. But that’s irrelevant because the theater’s in a strange part of town, and the nearest grocery store is twenty minutes away. In fact, the only things on this block are the theater, a paint shop specializing in shades of brown, and a store that sells balls. Just wall-to-wall balls of various shapes for various purposes.

An idea hits you: you could grab some balls from the ball store, paint them brown, and mix them in with the spaghetti. But what kind of balls do you want? Baseballs are too big. Marbles are too small. Ping pong balls are probably the right size, but they’re too perfect. They’d give the set an odd, cartoonish feel, and the director’s vision is more gritty/realistic.

That’s when you see them: a 36 Pack of Nike Grade A Recycled Golf Balls. The golf balls’ bumpy shape makes them look like they very well could be hand-packed balls of beef, yet their roundness will make them easily recognizable from any of the thirty seats in the theater.

You grab them, pay for them, and let out a sigh of relief! These clean, recycled golf balls will be given a second life… ON THE STAGE!

In the box:

(3) Nike 12BLBK-NIKE Recycled Golf Balls, 12-Pack

Woot