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Total Spa 24-Setting Combo Showerhead

Yes, hello? I was at your supermarket earlier today and I’d like to complain. This Total Spa 24-Setting Combo Showerhead of lettuce you sold me is VERY inappropriate for use in my chicken Caesar salad, and I feel I should have been informed of that on the label!

No, don’t you “not my department” me, young man! I’ll have you know that I’m holding this Total Spa 24-Setting Combo Showerhead in my hands right now, and NOWHERE on this label does it say not for use in salads! It does talk about “the best shower ever” and says something about 8 single and 16 combined flow patterns, but how is that going to showcase my garden fresh tomatoes? I suppose I could wash them with the five function modes, but that’s me making lemonade out of lemons, if you follow me.

No, I don’t have a problem with lemons. Now you’re being obtuse on purpose, I was very clear. My concern is with the lettuce. I might not be a farmer, but I’m pretty sure lettuce isn’t supposed to have an Advanced 3-Zone Precision Flow Dial. Just like a showerhead isn’t supposed to be green, leafy, crunchy and-

– okay, I’m not admitting anything, but let me ask a hypothetical question: if I just accidentally installed a head of lettuce in my shower, how much trouble will I be in when I turn the water on? Really? Huh.

Is that paper towel sale still running through the weekend?

Specifications
5-Functions:
  • Rain
  • Power Massage
  • Stay-Warm Mist
  • Economy Rain
  • Pause Mode
Care:
  • Clean flexible nozzles by rubbing with fingers or soft bristled toothbrush
  • Do not use harsh chemicals, only vinegar and water if needed to remove mineral deposits
Package Measurements: L 7.25″ x W 2.75″ x H 12″
Flexible Hose Length: 59″

Instructions

In the Box:

  • (1) Total Spa 24-Setting Ultra Luxury Multi Shower

Woot

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