Chaos Hat 3-Pack

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Use this: during a job interview, so the interviewer doesn’t see that weird “Bob Hope Shooting Lasers Out Of His Eyes” forehead tattoo.

Don’t use this: in a burrito. What you’re looking for are beans, not beanies.

Some skeptics wonder: whether it’s healthy for hair to keep it covered all the time.

When irradiated, this product will bite you, giving you the power of: a radioactively hot head! (Maybe hot like temperature, maybe hot like sexy. We’re not totally sure.)

At a karaoke bar, this product sings: “The Way It Is” by Bruce Hornsby, except instead of singing, “That’s just the way it is,” it sings, “Hat’s just the way it is.”

Care Instructions:

Machine Wash
Tumble Dry
Low Iron
Do NOT Bleach

In the box:

(3) Chaos Beanies

Woot