HEAD YouTek Four Star Racquet

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

They should tell you when you fall in love that it’s going to end up hurting you worse than anything you’ve ever even imagined. But no, they feed you endless pap about “true love” and “the power of love” and make it out to be some kind of pinnacle of human emotion rather than the festering swamp of hate and pain that it is.

What’s that? Oh. My editor is telling me I’m supposed to be writing about this HEAD YouTek Four Star Racquet. As though any of that matters. Well, it looks like it’s lightweight and maneuverable, and features a generous sweet spot that…

Listen, don’t be fooled by “generosity,” OK? Nobody gives you something without expecting even more back, until they’ve sucked you dry like a vampire bat on the haunch of a steer. They’ll just keeping sucking and sucking until you have nothing left to give, and then they’ll leave you for a guy with a better beard and…

FINE. FINE, MAURY. IT’S GOT AN OPEN STRING PATTERN FOR CONSIDERABLE AMOUNTS OF SPIN, OK? It’s a good tennis racquet. It will make you a better tennis player, though it can’t make you a more giving lover, and…

…Oh God I’m so ripped up inside. It’s still so raw. Take me back, Caroline. Look at me. Look at what you did.

Finding your grip size:  On your dominate hand, measure from the middle horizontal crease of your palm, up between your middle and ring fingers, to the tip of your ring finger.

In the box:

(Your Choice of Grip Size)

(1) HEAD 230231 Four Star Pre-Strung Tennis Racquet

Woot