SafeFlare Emergency Light 2-Pack
Monday, December 24, 2012
“Good morning, Benjamin!”
“Good morning, Suzanne.”
“I notice there seems to have been a little … incident? In front of my parking space today. I was hoping you could shed a little light on the situation.”
“Of course, Suzanne. It’s simple. When I learned these Safe Flare Light 2-Packs had nine bright LEDs and could mount on metal (like a vehicle) I figured it was the perfect excuse to make sure you got the message at last. I figured even you couldn’t miss an omnidirectional device with roughly 200 hours of life off a pair of AAA batteries.”
“What message were you trying to send, Benjamin?”
“Seriously? SERIOUSLY, Suzanne? Did you not see the giant sign on the other side of the SafeFlares? The one I had custom made?”
“I guess I was too focused on my meeting.”
“It had letters the size of your head! It cost me a week’s salary!”
“Well, we can stand here and point fingers, or we can find a productive answer. I’m ready when you are, Benjamin.”
“Suzanne- look, come with me to the window. I’ll show you.”
“Fair enough. Am I looking down there, where the SafeFlares are still glowing?”
“Yes. Just read the sign.”
“It says ‘No Parking Between-‘”
“No, no, no. The OTHER sign.”
“It says ‘Suzanne: my name’s not Benjamin.’ Huh. Is that sign true?”
“It is, Suzanne. It is. My name’s Roger. And all I want for Christmas is for you to stop calling me by the wrong name.”
“Wow, Benjamin. I had no idea. But hey, funny story, I already got you a Christmas gift!”
“Really.”
“Yeah, I called a lawyer to get a copy of your birth certificate. It said ‘Roger’ and I figured that was a typo, so I had it changed legally. To ‘Benjamin’ instead.”
“Suzanne, please tell me you’re joking.”
“I know! It’s like ‘Gift of the Magi’ now, isn’t it? By the way, you might want to call your bank as soon as possible to alert them to the changes. And don’t try to travel on your passport. Oh, and get those SafeFlares cleaned up, will you? I couldn’t park in my space so I moved them to the CEO’s spot, and he usually comes in around this time of day.”
| Battery | 2 – Aklaline AAA batteries |
| Operating & Strorage Temps | -50 degrees F to 248 degrees F |
| Light Emission | Omni-Directional (360 degrees) strobe light |
| Light Output | From light plug Red LEDs = 225,000 MC (9) sorted LEDs at 25,000MC |
| Visibility Range |
Night time >2 miles horizontally; >10 miles from the air Day time >1,000ft horizontally |
| Hazmat | Hermetically sealed and intrinsically safe |
| Chemical |
Contains no hazardous chemicals Resistant to most chemicals No acid compositions |
| Switch Type | Twist on/off |
| Flash Pattern | Flashing Strobe |
In the box:
(2) SafeFlare SF-777 Emergency Light
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