Screaming Mini Monkey Keychain with Woot Cape – $1.49
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Tiny Motorcycle Not Included
We’d like to make the jokes but… well, we’d get sued, most likely.
Listen, you know and we know what you think of when you hear the word purple. In fact, it’s the very thing everyone thinks about when they hear the word purple, ever since, ooo, June 25th, 1984? Certainly that summer, anyway, and almost straight through until now.
We could be clearer, but SOMEbody’s got a bad habit of wanting control, and not liking the Internet. Which is cool, you know, geniuses can be hard to work with sometimes. And, let’s face it, the man is seriously a genius. Like, seriously. Even if we can’t risk quoting you proof.
So just think to yourself “Who most connects with purple?” and you’ll probably catch on. And then, you’ll feel bad for us, and the situation we’re in. I mean, a purple cape? Screaming? Makes women want to run up and touch it? Are we talking about our little keychain monkey or… well, you know who?
And yet, we can’t risk doing a more specific parody because he’s got some really aggressive lawyers. Weep for us, readers. Weep for how beautiful this writeup could have been.
Warranty: None!
Condition: New
Features:
- Slingshot-like rubber arms
- Professed 50-foot flight range
- Keychain, a great place to put a key
- Majestic cape features equally majestic Woot logo
- Screams like the souls of the damned roasting over the fires of Hell
- Dimensions: 5 3/4” L x 2.5” W
In the box:
- Screaming Monkey Donned in a Purple Cape Adorned with Silver Woot Logo
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